Since then life has been a little crazy. I've felt anger, sadness, happiness, depression, and so many things in between. But through it all, my students and my own children have helped me to remain optimistic. When Governor Herbert announced that schools would be closed for the remainder of the school year I cried off and on all day. My husband came to talk to me about things that needed to be done that day, and I told him I just couldn't function. I couldn't make decisions at that point because I was so sad that I wasn't going to get to see my daughter play high school softball ever again, and I wasn't going to teach in my classroom for the remainder of the school year, and my daughter wasn't going to have a senior prom or a typical graduation. I don't remember if I even got dressed that day. There have been days since when I haven't felt like getting out of bed, but that day was definitely the worst day of the quarantine for me.
However, that day also helped me to reorganize and realize that even though the rest of the year wasn't going to be typical, I could do small things to help it seem normal. I started having Zoom meetings with my classes, and I held them during the times when we would have normally been in class. We did the same things I would have done in class too. I shared books with them that I have read, and then I read and discussed literature with them. We even had the class clowns join us and help us keep laughing when we really wanted to just give up and go back to bed. For my regular English 12 classes we were studying Anthony Doerr's All the Light We Cannot See, and I was super sad that I wouldn't get to do some of the cool activities I had planned, but I was still excited that so many of my students stuck with it and finished reading the book. We had our last Zoom meeting yesterday, and the majority of my students have completed the reading and the quizzes that were on Canvas for them. I even had one student who is usually a rebel and not motivated at all join in every meeting that he could, and he has completed the quizzes online. I love that kid, and I am so sad that I am not going to be able to give him a hug at graduation and tell him how proud of him I am. Another student sent me an email, and he said, "I'm going to read the whole book; I don't want to read the summaries for the parts that you sent us. I want to read it all, so I am going to need extra time for the quizzes. Is that ok?" You bet it was ok! I love seeing my students enjoy the literature that we study in class.
The last thing that I did to try to make things normal, but to also let my students know I love them, is I sent out "Skyridge Shout Out" cards to every student. I still have 21 to write, but before the year ends, every one of my students will have a card from me letting them know that I saw their hard work, and I appreciate and love them so much. We only have 20 days until the official last day of school, and it is still feeling weird for me, but I'm feeling optimistic as well. I know that my seniors have worked their guts out this year and for the last 13 years of their lives to get their high school diplomas. I know many of them don't know where they will be in the fall, but I know that they will be successful wherever they end up. They truly are an amazing group of people!
When I was pregnant in 2001, and I saw the planes hit the Twin Towers in New York on live television, I wondered what I was doing bringing a child into this world. Then she came, and her birth was not easy. She really should have been delivered by c-section, but the doctor insisted that we deliver her naturally. She came out with bruises on her head from the vacuum, and her skin was super dry because she was a week overdue, but she survived. She has been so strong, so intelligent, and so loving! I know she came at the right time, and I know her friends came at the right time because they are all strong, intelligent, and loving. Then this pandemic hit, and I thought, "Man, this really sucks for these poor kids!" They were born in a world of uncertainty, and now they are graduating in a world of uncertainty, but I know they are ready to face the uncertainty with courage. They have never backed down from the challenges and trials that have been thrown their way. I am so proud of the class of 2020, and I know that this isn't what they wanted or dreamed of, but I will always remember them as the class that overcame all the odds, and they will be the students I talk about for years to come.
